I have discovered a lot along the way because I didn’t find what I was looking for in other people’s work.

I failed heavily early in my life although I did everything I could in order not to.

I had to investigate.

Why was this happening for me. How could others who I was sure were not better than me in any way do what I couldn’t do.

I left no stone unturned.

I didn’t leave anything behind, when it came to what could explain why I was failing in life although I did everything right.

Of the things I had to check out was the self-help industry.

And I found it so infuriatingly empty.

You have to believe, is all they say. You are not trying to understand what they’re saying, you’re just waiting for the chance to respond and say what you want.

You get the idea. A house of cards. Mirage. An industry of non self-help. Fix your mindset.

Yeah, who told that I didn’t have the right mindset?

I found religion in self-help just as I have found religion in politics, even the most progressive of political positions.

Detachment from reality is something I have very low tolerance for.

So I decided, ironically enough, to help myself, on my own terms.

What made it easy for me is that I had no competition. It was just me in an empty universe. So whatever there is to explore or find, it was new territory that wasn’t found by anyone else. Whatever discovery I made was a Nobel prize level discovery, because this was all there is.

I’m not jumping on a trend to make money like the rest of the population on social media. I’m here, because this is personal for me. I want my vengeance. I have failed for too long. I’m no longer interested in succeeding. I just wanna know why.

Whatever the answer is I don’t have it.

I’ll keep researching until I die anyway, because I have no other reason to live.