Aim high. Do not let anyone make you aim smaller or lower in life, for any reason whatsoever. Live up to your full potential. Always stay true to your most authentic self. Dream big, and do what you want. There’s nothing wrong with you.

You are playing small, because you think there’s something wrong with you. 

Because you think you’re bad, not good enough, or filled with shame, you don’t aim high. You play small. You know your place. And you’re not actually settling, you think this is what you deserve, because you’re bad, and there’s something wrong with you. 

You are playing small, and you never live up to your full potential, or even one percent of your full potential, because you think you are small, bad, and not good enough. Because you are filled with shame. Even if you believe none of the above is true, consciously. Even if you believe there’s nothing wrong with you and that you are good enough on a conscious level. 

When you are surrounded by people who insist upon instilling and inculcating in you the unshakeable and firm belief that there’s a ton of stuff that is seriously wrong with you all the time, compared to the rest of us or normal people or society at large, you are going to hate yourself, and that self-loathing will be insanely crippling, and you will end up being unable to do anything whatsoever, let alone aspire for big things or a better life. 

Environment is everything. Even more important than mindset.

When you are bombarded all the time with attempts to belittle you and make you think less of yourself, you will end up picking any random trait, characteristic, or thing you have or that is unique to you or special about you, and think that you are eccentric, weird, crazy, bad, always wrong, or mentally ill because of it. Anything. Anything can fill this void or gap, and could be considered what is truly wrong with you from the start all these years. Even if this thing is the very thing that’s right with you.

Even if there’s nothing wrong with you or with this thing whatsoever, because you have been treated like garbage for years for some reason, and you don’t know what is that reason, and you don’t know why the abuse and belittling was taking place all those years in the first place, and so you end up blaming it on any random traits or characteristics that you have from the start, and end up thinking that this must be what’s wrong with you, and that this bad thing you always have, explains all the abuse, criticism, hate, and belittling you’ve always received, for as long as you can remember.

And so you end up living your whole life thinking that you have to suck at something, anything, even if there’s nothing that you cannot do. Even if you are extraordinarily genius. And that’s why, because of that flaw you have, or supposed dozens of flaws you have, you end up playing small. Too small. Tiny. Even if there’s literally nothing wrong with you, whatsoever.

And you still don’t want to go no contact with all of your abusers.

No amount of positive thinking or mindset will help you with that, and you will have zero energy all the time, if you are stuck with unlivable circumstances or a horrible situation or environment, no matter what.

It’s not about having energy. 

It’s about accomplishing your goals by any means necessary. 

It’s about fixing your life, getting your life together, and getting to the kind of life that you truly want and that is most true to your most authentic self. 

It’s about getting to a kind of life that gives you energy, as opposed to trying so hard and moving mountains in order to have more energy now when your life sucks majorly in order to have enough energy to make your life better and fix your life. 

You have to fix your life and get your life together first, before you can have energy. 

The whole point of hating your life now is the fact that it depletes your energy before you even get started. Before the day even begins! And that’s why you feel like nothing ever works for you, and that you’ve tried everything and still you can’t make any difference. Because the very nature of your current circumstances, environment, and life is energy depleting in and of itself, and so you feel you have no energy or motivation to try any solution, even the ones that you know will definitely work. 

Trying to have energy before you fix your life is like trying to swim against the tide. You may be capable of doing it, but don’t be surprised that it sometimes may not work. 

Get your life together first, and reach the kind of life that you truly desire first, and then you will have an abundance of energy that will always blow your mind, because for the very first time in your whole life, you and your inner child, are both equally and genuinely, happy. 

Sometimes less is more. More energy demanding in this case, which means you’ll burnout in this case prematurely and instantly, because you’re doing less. Or at least despite doing less. Burnout is not the enemy. Lack of achievement, results, and outcome is.

People think that when they do less, they’ll have more energy.

They will keep their energy longer in storage, because they are spending less of it as time goes by.

But contrary to whatever they told you, slowing down and spending less is not the answer. It will not cure the constant perpetual sense or state of fatigue or exhaustion you have all the time, before the day has even started, before you ever do anything.

Burnout does not come from doing too much.

Burnout comes from doing too little.

Feeling like you’ve done nothing, or accomplished nothing all day long, or all year long, is what’s depleting your energy all the time, not working too much, not doing too much.

Remember, the problem is accomplishing nothing all day long, or all year long, or all your life. Not doing nothing all the time, or not working long or hard enough.

Doing more or working long or hard enough does not get you out of that perpetual sense of exhaustion or alleviate burnout. Results do. Achievement and accomplishment will do. If that is what you mean by doing more, then so be it. We’re in agreement here. But if you think working more, harder, or longer but still accomplishing nothing will be the answer to burnout or perpetual exhaustion, you’re wrong. That’s not quite what I had in mind when I said doing more is the answer.

And this is for a simple reason. You are spending too much energy all the time even when what you’re doing is simple and easy, because you are not fulfilled. You are low on reward, Dopamine, and Serotonin. And that’s why everything seems harder, and that’s why everything depletes your energy instantly. You are pushing yourself to do everything, even if it is supposed to be incredibly easy.

Doing less will not help you with that, because you have no energy to begin with.

But when you feel fulfilled, rewarded, and high on your sense of accomplishment and achievement, the floodgates will open, and everything you do will take infinitely less energy. Which means it will be insanely hard for you to hit burnout, if not impossible. Not because you’re doing less, but because you’re doing amazing.