There’s nothing that you can do to make the narcissist decide to no longer want to hurt you. Even if you gave them all that they ever want or ask of you. Even if you treat them the way they prefer or choose. Every course of action possible to take with them to make them not be angry with you will lead to the same outcome: You should hate yourself for being who you are and there’s no way out of this. You’re damned if you do, damned if you don’t. And that includes everything or every option you are presented with when dealing with the narcissist. Their whole moral code contains one thing: why don’t you let us abuse you all we want at will without making a fuss about it? Do you think you are better than us? Do you believe you are more important than us? If not, then this is how we become happy. Why don’t you want us to be happy like you. And the only way for us to be happy is to keep abusing you. This is how we become happy our way, on our own terms, and people are different. If you do not let us have our way, this means that you want to be happy but at the expense of us being happy as well. You want happiness for you only. You are hurting us by depriving us from what brings us happiness most: abusing you. You are putting your own happiness and life before us, and you are choosing yourself instead of us, which means you are a horrible human being, selfish, evil, and hate us for who we are. Yes we are bad people and you are hating us for who we are. It is you who is evil. The problem here is that the accusations that you are making towards them are the same that they are making towards you, and they are not making that up. They genuinely believe they are the good guys in this scenario. At least only when they are fighting with you. They believe their own lies during the fights, only to laugh at them after the fight is over. They know they are taking advantage of you. They know you are just supply to them. They know that they are evil. But they just have to act as if they are equal to you in terms of being in the wrong here. You are both bad. This is what they try to prove to you and to the whole world during fights. Everybody is flawed and horrible and we just have to learn to adjust and adapt to each other to get along in peace. There’s nothing special about them. They are as bad as everybody else behind closed doors. They try to brainwash you that all the happiness you witness everywhere on all the happy people out there is fake, just as everything about them. You must know that these people are not only evil, but they are so focused on destroying you to the best of their ability, by any means necessary, and legally, without the law enforcement having anything against them, without them getting punished by the law. Their life’s purpose is to destroy you. They derive the greatest pleasure from accomplishing that objective. They want nothing else in the world. They decided that there are other people in this world who are too happy and successful to be left alone without showing them how real suffering looks like. Without making everything in the universe about them, not you or anybody else in the entire existence. They’re determined to make you reach the highest level of suffering possible just because they know deep down that you’re better than them, and somehow they have no chance in life because of you and people like you, and it is unfair, so they dehumanize you and justify everything evil and harmful ever they do to you, because you already deserve it, because you are better than them, or in some cases, not necessarily better, but good enough to act as a supply for them to feed their delusions of being special, superior, and amazing in every way possible. Just a weak victim, who lets them have their way with them, until they are satisfied. The perfect victim. They think this way. They are that evil. And sometimes that evil person is your parent. Sometimes it happens to be your mother, or father, or both. Sometimes it is also your brothers or sisters. And it becomes so perfect because who do you think you are? Do you think you are right and all of us, your own entire family, is wrong and bad? Clearly you are out of your mind. You’re crazy. And your image, perception, and interpretation of reality is distorted and is always wrong. Nothing that you will ever do will make them happy with you. Nothing that you try to appease them with and calm them down with will ever make them normal with you. There isn’t anything that you can do to make them love you enough to stop torturing you until you die. Sorry, but there is no cure for evil. Sorry for having to burst your bubble. These are not rare cases. They are too many. Too many. And the only answer I know of is to cut them off entirely out of your life. No contact with the narcissist is the answer. And until you become brave enough to embrace such reality, I’m afraid you will remain a failure for life.