If your whole life revolves around avoidance of making mistakes and never ever doing something wrong, you will become nothing but just that. Something that didn’t make any mistakes or do anything wrong today.
It’s not about telling you to toughen up and rely on yourself, as some form of independence or growing up. You cannot reward yourself with positive emotion, and all the effects that happen because of them, if you hate yourself. No amount of external resources can change that, because you don’t deserve it, and so your own self will refuse to reward you with anything positive, because you know or you think you don’t deserve any of that. Just as self-loathing would leave you with no room for improvement at all because why would you improve something that doesn’t deserve to exist or doesn’t deserve anything positive, self-love and radical acceptance of yourself will make improving yourself something that makes sense, because you are a good person and you deserve the best, it’s okay to improve you, and thus you will have a greater chance at growth and improvement of yourself as well as attaining happiness, fulfillment, and all sorts of positive emotions and states there is. You will change to something better than you were before. Something new, because just as negativity is destructive to what you are, the positivity that all this entails is something that definitely leads to you becoming actually better than whatever that you thought you could ever be. It actually increases your full potential, as opposed to just helping you only get a little bit closer to your already previously existing full potential you had from the start. It is constructive. It leads to something new that was never there before.
Under socialism, you are given according to your contribution. Even under communism, you are given according to your needs, not wants or desires. As Mel Robbins puts it: No one is coming for you. No one.
What can you get from other people? Anything but pleasure. Only yourself holds the authority to open the floodgates for you. No external person can do that for you, because they don’t control your body. Only if you love and accept yourself fully and totally, we’re talking about radical acceptance of oneself here, will your own self reward you by giving you everything you need and want that only they have access to. Only they can open the floodgates of happiness, fulfillment, pleasure, and growth for you to bask in. To enjoy all you want. No one who is outside of you, no one else, nobody aside from you, can offer, access, or give you any of these things that only you can have access to or control over. People can give you money, but they cannot give you pleasure or happiness. They cannot offer or hand you positive emotion. It has to be created from within, because you deserve it.